Man of My Dreams Read online

  What was this deep-seated throbbing she felt?

  This unbearable ache?

  He made her light-headed and breathless. And she wanted him desperately.

  “Would you make love to me?”

  Adron pulled back in surprise. Had he been sober, he would have sent her away, but there was something about her that called out to him in a way he’d long forgotten.

  It’d been an eternity since he last slept with a woman. Years of bitter, aching loneliness and pain.

  And here she was offering herself to him.

  Send her away.

  But he didn’t. Instead, he found himself getting up from the booth and leading her through the crowd.

  Livia didn’t know where they were going, but she made sure none of the guards saw her as they left the bar. In the back of her mind, she was terrified. She didn’t know anything about this man.

  Not even his name.

  Never in her life had she done anything so foolish. And yet she instinctively knew he wouldn’t hurt her.

  There was pain in his icy blue eyes, but not cruelty.

  He kept a possessive arm draped over her. And he walked by leaning heavily on a gold-tipped cane.

  She wanted to ask him what had happened to his face and leg, but didn’t dare lest it cause him to reconsider.

  He led her outside the club, to a transport.

  After they got in, they rode three levels down to an upper-scale apartment building.

  Livia relaxed a tiny bit as they entered the grand lobby. At least she wouldn’t be seduced in a dark, filthy back room somewhere.

  Krista had well prepped her on what to expect. Right down to an estimation of how long a man would take before he let her go.

  Taking a deep breath for courage, Livia figured she would be back in her hotel room by midnight. There would be questioning, and eventually her father would learn the truth.

  God have mercy on her then.

  But she had made her decision and once her mind was set on something, that was it. She would not be swayed.

  Without a word to each other, they took a lift to the top floor.

  He led her into a flat that was almost the size of her palace chambers. And as soon as he closed the door, he pulled her into his arms.

  This time his kiss was fierce. Demanding. His kiss stole her breath as he pressed her back against the wall.

  Her head swam at the powerful feel of his hands roaming over her.

  What are you doing?

  Shut up, she shouted at her mind, squelching the guilt and fear.

  It was her life and she was going to claim it.

  With that thought in mind, she started unbuttoning his shirt.

  Adron sucked his breath in sharply at the feel of her hand against his bare chest. Her touch singed him. He could only vaguely recall someone other than doctors, nurses, or therapists touching his flesh.

  To her credit, she didn’t cringe or comment about the multitude of scars that bisected his body. She didn’t even seem to notice them.

  That was why he hadn’t been with a woman since that long-ago night. He hadn’t wanted to explain the scars. To recount where they had come from.

  To have to face his lover in the early morning light.

  Perhaps that was why he’d chosen a stranger tonight. He owed her no explanation. Owed her nothing at all.

  He didn’t want to see pity or repugnance on a lover’s face.

  But there was nothing in her pale green eyes except curiosity and hunger.

  Livia had never seen a man’s bare chest before, at least nowhere other than on reels.

  Fascinated by it, she ran her hands over the smooth, tawny skin that was stretched tight over hard, steely muscles. Like velvet over steel. The contrast amazed her.

  “You feel so wonderful,” she breathed.

  Adron pulled back to look at her. There was a strange note of awe in her voice, a gentle hesitancy in her touch. And in that instant, a feeling of dread consumed him.

  He was drunk, but he wasn’t that drunk. “You’re a virgin.”

  Her face turned bright red.

  “Shit!” he snarled as he stepped away from her.

  His erection ached and his entire body burned. Leave it to him to find the only virgin he was sure had ever set foot inside the Golden Crona.

  Gripping his cane, he limped his way to his bar and poured another drink. But the watered-down alcohol did nothing for him.

  Suddenly, she was behind him, leaning up against his back as her slender arms surrounded his waist.

  He shook all over from the gesture, from the feel of her small breasts against his spine. And in that moment, he needed her even more.

  “I want you to make love to me,” she whispered in his ear.

  “Are you insane?” He turned to look at her.

  She shook her head. “I want to give my virginity away. I don’t want it taken from me.”

  “Taken by whom?”

  She dropped her gaze. “Fine. If you don’t want me, I’ll go find someone who does.”

  A peculiar wave of jealousy stung him as he thought of someone else inside her.

  What do you care?

  And yet for some unknown, stupid reason, he did.

  He caught her hand as she moved away from him. “What’s your name?”

  “Livia.”

  “Livia,” he repeated. It suited her and those guileless sea-green eyes. “Why would you give yourself away so cheaply to someone like me?”

  Livia paused as she saw the self-deprecation in his icy eyes. He hated himself. It was so obvious and she wondered why. “Because you seem nice.”

  He laughed bitterly at her answer. “Nice? I’m not nice. There’s nothing nice about me.”

  That wasn’t true. He had yet to be mean to her. He was hurting, she knew that. And it made him snappish.

  But it didn’t make him cruel.

  “I need to go,” she said quietly, regretting that he wouldn’t be the one after all. “There’s not much time before I have to return, and I have to take care of this by the morning.”

  “Why?”

  Livia bit her lip as she felt her face flush again. In the morning, she’d be inspected by Clypper’s doctors.

  If she didn’t find a man tonight, she was doomed.

  “I just do.” She let her gaze wander over his lush body. He had broad shoulders and a lean, firmly muscled frame. His white hair contrasted sharply with the black he wore.

  He was gorgeous.

  But he didn’t want her.

  Adron saw the steely determination in her eyes. She was going to find herself another man to sleep with her. He knew it.

  He should let her and yet . . .

  Why not me?

  Ever since he’d lost his agility, he’d avoided women. He’d been afraid of embarrassing himself with his stiff clumsiness. But she would have no one to compare him to.

  Adron gripped his cane. He remembered a time when he could have scooped her up in his arms and run with her to his bed.

  But those days were lost to him forever.

  “My bedroom is this way,” he said, grabbing a bottle and heading down the hallway.

  Livia quivered as she realized he was inviting her to join him.

  Excited and terrified, she followed him down the elegant corridor and into a room at the end of it. The master bedroom was every bit as large as her own. A king-sized bed was set against the far wall, looking out over the city below them.

  He set his bottle down on the nightstand, then moved to a chair by the bed. His face hard, he sat down slowly.

  She saw the pain on his face as he bent his leg and moved to take off his boots.

  She wanted to know what had happened to him, but didn’t dare ask for fear of making him angry.

  So, she went to him and took his foot in her hand.

  He looked up at her, his eyes startled as she pulled the boot free.

  “You know, I’ve never done anything like this,” she
whispered.

  “Seeing that you’re a virgin, I would think not.”

  Licking her lips, she removed his other boot.

  Adron could feel her nervousness, her uncertainty, and he wanted to soothe her. “I won’t hurt you,” he assured her.

  She smiled a smile that wrenched his gut. How he wished he’d met her before that fateful night. Then, he could have been the lover she deserved. He would have been able to take her all night. Slowly. Teasingly.

  He had no idea what he’d be like now. But he would try to pleasure her. Do his damnedest to make sure her first time was a favorable memory.

  His groin tight, he pushed himself up and moved to the bed.

  Before he knew what she intended, she sat in his lap and kissed him.

  Adron inhaled the sweetness of her breath as he ran his hands over her back. He’d never expected a virgin to be so bold. And she was a quick learner. She deepened her kiss and teased his tongue with hers.

  Oh, yeah, this could be fun.

  He unbuttoned her shirt to expose her small corslet. She moaned as he ran his hand over the satin-covered breasts and squeezed them gently in his hands.

  Livia shook all over at the foreign throb between her legs. And when he released the catch behind her back and her corslet fell open, she shivered. No man had ever seen her naked before.

  He stared at her bare breasts as he ran his hands over the taut peaks. He traced slow, simmering circles around her, sending chills all over her body.

  “You are so beautiful,” he breathed. Then, he dipped his head down and took her breast into his mouth.

  Livia hissed in pleasure as his tongue swirled around her flesh, teasing, licking.

  Never had she felt anything like it.

  She leaned forward, cradling his head in her hands. Her body was on fire. He trailed his hands over her back, down her hips, and when he touched her between her legs she groaned.

  He looked up at her, his eyes dazed and hungry as he breathed raggedly.

  He rolled her over, onto the mattress, and turned the lights off. She heard him remove the rest of his clothes in the darkness, but she couldn’t see anything at all.

  Adron ached to see her naked, but he didn’t want any light for her to see his damaged body.

  His groin hot and throbbing for her, he unfastened the stiff, prickly brace on his left leg and let it fall to the floor. Next, he removed the one on his hand.

  Then, slowly, carefully, he pulled her clothes from her.

  He ran his hand over her smooth, hot skin, delighting in her murmurs of pleasure. He’d never taken a virgin before and the knowledge that he was her first lover added even more excitement to the moment.

  No man had ever touched her.

  No one but him.

  Even with his wings broken and clipped, he soared at that knowledge.

  Livia moaned as he covered her with his long, hot body. She’d never felt anything like all that lean, hard strength spread out evenly against her bare flesh.

  He kissed her fiercely as he separated her thighs with his knee. Then, he pressed his thigh against the center of her body, the hairs on his leg teasing her intimately.

  She ran her hand over his back, feeling the rugged terrain of scars, muscle, and skin.

  “My name is Adron,” he breathed in her ear a second before he traced the outline of her ear with his tongue.

  “Adron,” she repeated, testing the syllables. It was a strong name that suited him.

  He stroked her with his thigh, his tongue, and his hands. Arching her back, Livia welcomed his touch. It was so wickedly erotic to feel him all over and yet see nothing of him. It was like a dream. A midnight fantasy.

  Reaching up, she freed his hair and let it fall around his face, then she buried her hands in the silken strands of it. He leaned down and placed his lips in the crook of her arm, where he suckled her flesh.

  Adron swallowed as he pulled back, wanting desperately to see her face. Instead, he lifted his hand to trace the contours of it. He could feel the tiny cleft in her chin, imagine the small oval face overwhelmed by large green eyes that tugged at a heart he had thought was dead.

  She was breathtaking. And for tonight, she was his.

  All his.

  Closing his eyes, he moved himself down her body, then cursed as a wave of fierce pain lanced up his leg and across his back.

  She tensed beneath him. “What’s wrong?”

  Adron couldn’t answer. The pain in his leg was so intense that it instantly quelled his desire.

  He rolled over onto his back and struggled to breathe.

  “Adron?”

  The concern in her voice ate at him.

  “My leg,” he said between clenched teeth. “I need the painkillers on my nightstand.”

  “Which leg?”

  “Dammit, get my medicine.”

  “Which leg!” she insisted.

  “The left one.”

  Livia took his knee into her hands.

  Adron cursed as more pain tore through him. “Stop!” he snarled.

  “Shh,” she said peacefully as she massaged the joint.

  A strange warmth came from her hands, seeping into his skin. Adron frowned as the ache diminished.

  Then suddenly, it was gone entirely.

  For a full minute, he lay there, tense, waiting for it to return.

  It didn’t.

  In fact, nothing hurt. Not his chest, not his arm, not his knee. Nothing.

  “What did you do?”

  “It’s only temporary,” she whispered. “But for a few hours, it won’t bother you at all.”

  Adron couldn’t believe it. He’d learned to live in a state of constant, unrelenting pain. Physical agony so severe that he couldn’t sleep for more than a couple of hours at a time.

  Until now.

  The absence of it was unbelievable. His heart swelled with joy. He was free. Even if it was only temporary, he still had a moment to remember what he’d been like before his body had been cruelly, vengefully taken from him.

  And it was all because of her.

  He pulled her into his arms and kissed her precious lips.

  Livia felt his heart pounding under her hand and she heard the laughter in his voice. “Thank you.”

  She smiled. Until he moved down her body with his kisses. Livia moaned as fierce pleasure tore through her. His hands and mouth felt incredible against her bare skin.

  This was so much more than she had expected. Krista had told her that a man who didn’t know her would be quick with the deed, then let her leave.

  But Adron was taking his time. He seemed to actually savor her.

  It was as if he was really making love to her. And she wondered, if he was this tender with a stranger how much more so would he be if they actually knew each other?

  But tonight was all they would ever know. When it was over she would leave him, and this moment would be nothing more than a treasured memory she would carry with her the rest of her life.

  Tonight, there was just the two of them.

  And she would revel in it.

  Adron drank in the smell and taste of her skin as he nibbled the bare flesh of her hip. The taste of her was addictive, and her smell . . .

  He could breathe in the sweet floral scent forever.

  Her soft hands caressed his hair and neck in a way that made him burn. He’d never thought to have another night like this.

  A night with no demons. No memories.

  She engulfed him and he gladly surrendered himself to her.

  She was his angel of mercy, delivering him from his sins. Delivering him from his loneliness and solitude. He would treasure this peaceful moment for the rest of his life. It would warm him and keep him company when his body returned to being hateful.

  His heart tender for her, he spread her legs and placed his body between them.

  Livia bit her lip, expecting him to enter her. He didn’t. Instead, he kissed a small path down her thigh while he buried his h
and at the center of her body.

  She hissed from the pleasure of his touch. It was sweet, pure bliss. And he took his time circling her with his fingers, delving, stroking, caressing.

  “That’s it,” he breathed against her leg as she rubbed herself against his hand. “Don’t be embarrassed.”

  She should be and yet she wasn’t.

  At least not until he took her into his mouth.

  Blind ecstasy ripped her asunder. “Adron?” she asked, her voice husky and strange. “Are you supposed to do that?”

  He gave her one long, deep lick. “Does it feel good?”

  “Oh, yes.”

  “Then I’m supposed to be doing it.” Without another word, he returned his mouth to her.

  Livia writhed in his arms as his tongue tormented her. And when he slid his finger inside her, she thought she would perish from the pleasure.

  Krista had told her to expect pain, but there was nothing painful in his touch. Nothing but heaven.

  She threw her head back as he swirled his finger inside her, around and around, matching the rhythm of his tongue.

  Assaulted by fierce, fiery sensations, Livia felt her body quiver and jerk as if it had a mind of its own.

  Her ecstasy mounted until she could stand no more and then just as she was ready to beg him to stop, her body ripped apart.

  Livia screamed out as her release came hard and fast.

  Still he toyed with her. His finger and tongue pleasured her until the sensitive flesh couldn’t bear his touch any longer.

  “Please,” she cried. “Please, have mercy on me.”

  Adron laughed at her tone, and was amazed at the sound. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed.

  He pulled back, but kept his finger inside her for a moment longer. He could feel her maidenhead still intact. His body burned, demanding he take her. But he couldn’t do that. They hadn’t done any real damage to her yet.

  Once he broke that barrier, there would be no going back. No second chances.

  It would be like when he decided to . . .

  He flinched at the memory. His life had been completely ruined by one impulsive act. He wouldn’t let her ruin hers the same way.

  She was kind and gentle. A pure heart in a world of corrupt ones.

  He wouldn’t spoil that.

  Closing his eyes, he was mystified by what he felt for her. At the fact that he was able to pull himself back and rein in his treacherous body.